Movie Reviews

Archive for 2010

Congrats to TJMAC510 for getting on the board with the Beginner level poster last week; it should come as no surprise that J.D. took home the two points awarded for the Expert one.
BEGINNER

EXPERT

Standings:
J.D. – 17
Fletch – 14
Nick – 6
Wendymoon, Clive Dangerously – 5
Jason/Daniel, David Bishop, Rachel, Dreamrot (smacdonn) – 3
Evan Derrick, Jason Soto, BD79, JLG – 2
Steel11Kane, TonyD, Luke Harrington, Adam Ross, Justin, Anders, Dave, Big Mike Mendez, Nic Cage, CaptainRon19, TJMAC510 – 1
Here are the altered/actual posters from last time:

It’s that time again for TGITDNMAR, which (obviously) stands for Thank God It’s The Day New Movies Are Released.
When in Rome
Edge of Darkness
“Hi. My name is Fletch, and I will go to see bad movies if I have to.”
“Hi, Fletch. Welcome to the group – admitting you have a problem is the first step.”
“Thanks. I feel doubly guilty about it because I’m one of those people that tells others to quit bitching about sequelitis and remakeitis, insisting that if they’d just have the temerity to stop attending crap, Hollywood would get the message and stop making it. But see, (my wife and) I like going to the movies. We enjoy the theatrical experience. We don’t have Netflix, we rarely rent, especially lately (maybe twice in the past year). We have a DVR and the HBO family of programs and TCM and any other commercial-free channels we may not be aware of at this moment, so that enables us to catch up on much of what we might’ve missed (or not missed yet still feel compelled to watch – I’m looking at you, Eagle Eye). We don’t mind having a healthy chunk of our entertainment dollars going to a theater.
But damnit, is it too much to ask for one halfway decent option a week? WTF is this crap?!?”
“We feel you pain, Fletch. But are you willing to break this cycle?”
“I dunno. When we get hard up and have seen all of the things we want to see – and have even stretched it with others like Daybreakers and The Book of Eli – we usually just don’t go as often, making it out maybe once a week instead of twice a week or so. But frankly, when we go much more than seven days without a hit, we start to go a little nuts, clawing at our skin and biting the heads off of those that attempt to engage us in normal behaviors. We start to consider seeing the likes of Leap Year and whatever Nic Cage might be out that week, if only because I have some sort of sadomasochistic relationship with him. It can be painful sometimes, but a release is still a release. Only when something is monumentally bad (Strange Wilderness) do I really regret it, though my wife might disagree.”
“What about this week? Are you feeling vulnerable, like you might relapse? Are you being tempted by either When in Rome or Edge of Darkness?”
“You’re goddamned right I’m feeling vulnerable. The last thing I saw was The Book of Eli, and that pretty much sucked, and must have been two weeks ago. And this week’s new releases look like garbage – how many times must we see the Angry Dad movie [thanks to Simon and Jo for that one] before that sh*t is deemed staler than Wonder Bread from 1984? Oh, but it’s combined with the Vigilante Revenge movie that we’ve never seen before. Throw in a heaping pile of Boston Mel Gibson and I’m about ready to watch The International again. And by the way, more Boston? Can a friggin’ movie be set in Milwaukee for chrissakes? How about Atlanta? There are other cities in the US and the world-at-large.
Oh yeah, that’s right, like Rome. Forgotten Sarah Marshall. Has that Josh Duhamel guy ever been in anything remotely good before? And if you say that Las Vegas TV show, I’ll bet on black like Wesley Snipes (whatever that means). Just meh.
So yeah, we’ll probably relapse, but I sure as hell hope it’s not with either of these piles. The Blind Side, here we come.” *groan*
“Please leave our group.”
Fletch’s Chance of Viewing (in the theater):
When in Rome: 8%
Edge of Darkness: 11%

It’s back, and it goes like this: I’m going to give you the initials of a number of characters from a movie. It won’t always be the same number of characters, and the initials won’t always stand for a proper name. You name the movie. Simple enough? I thought so.
The Movies
1. W, B, IM, F, V
2. IJ, MR, RB
3. RB, A, ID, P, AC
4. JC, KR, JG
5. DO, RR, LC, FC, TB, TO
6. D, R, V, C, J, SB
7. JL, PF, KM, CO, SS,
8. RB, VC, BF, BT, CK
9. M, T, R, S, C
10. DK, MM, FF, TH, VK
11. BM, LBD, NL, EB
12. CW, AW, DR, F, DS, LD, EB
Good luck!
Standings:
Arjun – 1
Correct answers so far:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
11.
12.

A few months back, I went over a list of some of the podcasts that I listen to regularly. One of the ones I discussed was The Film Cynics, and here’s what I said at the time:

Steve Johnston and Brian Dutkewich of The Cynical Blog are more than mere podcasters; they have their own radio show! Airing on Sundays on Victoria, Canada’s own C-FAX 1070, the Cynics re-purpose their show as a podcast (minus the air breaks and commercials), and I’m glad they do. Being pros and all, their podcast is one of the slickest you’ll hear, and the guys’ segments are clearly defined and individually entertaining, going over a featured topic, followed by picks from the vault, some high-tech talk and their DVD picks of the week.

The Cynics joined the LAMB a long, long time ago (they’re #166 out of 430+), and you’ve likely seen Steve around the comments section here and there, and vice versa for me on their site. Somewhere along the way, though, Steve got the hair-brained idea that I might be a worthy guest on their live radio show.
Well, I did it this past Sunday. Going live to Victoria, BC and beyond (just how far beyond, I couldn’t tell you), I did a phoner with the guys as we discussed The LAMB, Blog Cabins, and The Book of Eli, which we had previously butted heads over. Hopefully, I acquitted myself and didn’t sound like too much of a jackass despite my proclivity for the word “definitely” (I barely recognize my voice, by the way, so don’t be alarmed if you’ve heard it previously). Lucky for you, you can judge for yourself – the whole show can be heard here, though as you might’ve guessed, I recommend becoming a regular listener to their podcast (or show, should you happen to live around Victoria, which you likely don’t).
Big thanks go out to the Cynics for having me on; it was a lot of fun and quite the honor.

Everyone knows that it requires a leap of faith to believe in a higher power. It takes perhaps an even larger one to accept many of the events depicted in the bible as fact (parting of the Red Seas, changing of water to wine, the creation of the earth in six days, what have you). That’s child’s play compared to all of the ridiculous bullshit the Hughes brothers attempt to shove down your throat, and if you can accept all of it, then brother, you’ve got a hell of a lot more faith than I do.
Taking their cues from a never-ending stream of previous works – but most notably from Sergio Leone’s spaghetti westerns and The Road Warrior – the brothers Hughes have crafted a mostly enjoyable if derivative actioner, complete with top-notch choreography, overacting from the world’s best overactor (Gary Oldman, natch), out-of-nowhere bit parts played by excellent vets (Michael Gambon and Tom Waits), and one of the least believable gotcha-twists that this moviegoer would ever be able to let go of. I’m more inclined to believe in the preposterous ending to the universally panned thriller Orphan than I am to Eli’s mind-bender.
It all got me to thinking of another movie you likely won’t see Eli compared to any time soon, Mike Leigh’s 2008 dramedy Happy-Go-Lucky. In it, we’re introduced to Poppy, an optimist so eternal that you could cop a squat into her morning coffee and she’d see the bright side in the situation, probably something along the lines of “I don’t like decaf anyway – cheerio!” I found her personality not likable, but unbelievable and grating; I refused to believe that a person so cheery could exist, not without some dark side that they never let the world see.
While reading about Happy, it wasn’t long before I found a bit of commentary in which someone likened the film to be a litmus test of one’s own personality: if one could see truth in Poppy’s being, then one was likely an optimist as well, whereas those who were irritated by her were likely pessimists. Of course, I prefer the term realist to pessimist, but the shoe fit either way.
The Hughes brothers appear to be conducting that same kind of experiment with Eli, though this time around the test revolves around the faith of their audience. It takes a true believer to watch the events unfold, then be handed a whopper of an M. Night-ism and be able to accept it, and – as if I didn’t know it beforehand – it’s clear to me that I have failed their test.
Fletch’s Film Rating:”Whatever”Shaky Cam Rating (details):LAMBScore:
P.S. – One more comparison: this is The Road + Waterworld. Take that for whatever it might mean to you.
P.P.S. – If you’d like to get an idea of the atmosphere that the Hughes’ set for you in this post-apocalyptic world, I’ve done that for you as well (click for larger view):